Thursday

The very very very good thing about today is that I am getting a mani-pedi. And the other things are, well, interesting.

This has been a fun week, and I am trying to remember the last time I said that about a week. I had an audition Tuesday that went well, and last night a really super fun time with a fabulous soprano who was in my studio in grad school. We were the only two girl grad students in the studio, and I always felt like Ms. E had my back. Lots of water has gone under the bridge since then, but I am so glad we have reconnected. I think there might be a joint recital in the works, too!

It's nice to be in that place where I no longer feel like I have to spend time with people that I don't really like that much or who are kind of mean...I've grown the ego strength to be choosy about who my time is spent with. When I realized, at long last, that I wasn't necessarily going to get that kind of support from my parents, I decided to start being a little more picky about my friends. And so, the level of drama in my life has drastically decreased, and I feel, interestingly, that since I've kind of put my expectations out there into the universe, new friends have come into the picture, and old ones have resurfaced. So even though, it was like I had done some weeding out, the circle has actually grown.

My audition Tuesday was because of the referral of a new friend: a conductor she knew was looking for a soprano for a specific gig. In the course of our pre-audition small talk, he mentioned that her had never had a soprano recommend another soprano ever before in the course of his career until now! And it reminded me of the warning my undergrad voice teacher gave me before I went off to grad school: "Jessica, you're going to have to make friends with some nice mezzos, because I think it is really hard for sopranos to be friends with each other." I think that as a rule, that might be true, (based on some really f'ed up audition experiences I have had) but evidently, I have found the good ones, and here we are! I am so grateful for that.

Ruth used to tell me that the voice and the performance match the person, and never have I found that to be so true as now. I am starting to notice it in every show I go to-- a certain kindness and belief and spirituality goes into true music-making, and I think that is why when you meet another singer, you can somehow anticipate what they will sound like just by who they are. My very favorite example of this are the performances and recordings of Lorraine Hunt Lieberson. That is the level of art that can be created when we are willing to give of ourselves, in our lives and in our music.