Thursday, October 01, 2009

Thursday, part deux

Sometimes it takes a lot of courage to actually do what you want to do.

Because the truth is, there are just a lot of people, places, and things out there that make you feel as though it really isn't the best idea. I guess I have finally gotten to the ripe old age, however, (and yes, I will stop making age-related comments at some point) that I just kind of realize that the people that love me are totally behind my choice, one hundred percent... choices like having or not having kids, buying or not buying a house, pursuing a rather money-sucking career like singing, eating meat, watching Bravo, etc. Okay, well some of those are a little silly.

Oh how lovely it must be-- and in all honesty, I have actually been envious of these people-- to walk around in a constant state of single-minded focus and arrogance, as if all that mattered were my own feelings. And while we know that this kind of person isn't pleasant to be around, would probably be horrible in bed, and further more is a big suck to our global consciousness, I sometimes think that it would just be so damn great to not care what other people think!

As a singer, I wonder what the panel is thinking, what the audience is thinking, how they view my sound in relationship to my rep, if they think I am too young to be singing this, if they can understand my words, and, worst of all, if they see me and put me in that dreaded category of singers who need to lose weight to be believable in their fach. Oh, we could go on and on with our self-analyzing neurosis.

My work for this week (and the rest of my life) will be to practice being fearless, in everything, in every aspect of my singing and personal life. They say be your self, but I say just be. I will own that I have worked on myself, trust that what I do is a product of that hard work, and I think you should too. *wink*

No fear.


ohmymessyhead said...

You should practice allowing other people to be fearless too.


Jessica said...

good point, gracie!

rahree said...

i guarantee that "fearless" is one of the things that audition panels look for...if you're confident, then we can relax and enjoy your performance, instead of worrying/hoping/sending good vibes out of our's a huge part of what separates students from professionals.

You can do it.

(And best of luck if you have upcoming auditions!)

Jessica said...

Awesome insight, Rahree! thank you.